Hope Center

It is one ordinary Thursday, of November, in the buildings of Tilganga Eyes Centre. Tens of patients sat, come there to meet the various ophthalmologists. Some kill time in a way surprising like this child killing louses on her mother’s head, relaxed as if that belonged to the naturalness in a hospital.

Sunita, arrival of Rukum, are the reason of our presence here. It suffers from a tumor to the face, near to the eye, and we came to consult the surgeon ocular-plastic.

Suddenly, environment becomes animated when a young mother, at most 17 years old, presents door 125. In his arms, hidden under a red fabric side, a child cries. The mother penetrates in the room, arises, moves away to return accompanied by two members from her family. It is at this time that we penetrate, at the same time as it in the cabinet of the Doctor.

This one observes initially the stereotypes of the scanner of the child. Then, it reads the report/ratio, raises the eyes on the mother. It decries it initially: “You should not shake your child thus. Ca will not make it stop crying ". The child has at more the one year observes one when his/her mother, very irritated it is true by the tears of his/her son, the side concerns fabric. One discovers his left bulging eye, the sutured eyelid, sign that a first surgical operation took place.

On a monotonous tone, the surgeon declared: “Your child has an enormous cancer behind the left eye. It is necessary all to withdraw, even the eye. You must go in Baktapur Cancer Hospital. I write a letter of introduction, you will hold me with the current ". A heavy silence settled. My legs suddenly pain to carry me. The large father questions the surgeon: “One will withdraw the eye too to him?” The doctor, on a sympathizing tone, answers! “Maybe no…..”.

The family leaves the part. One leans then on the case of Sunita which consequently appears less serious to us.

The finished consultation, we take the way which leads to the center of medical imagery. On our road, we catch up with the family. They are cut down, carry in them all the misery of the world. The large father explains that they come from the district of Kavré, before adding: “Babouko anka bigréko! katham bhayo! ke garné? “This which means: “The eye of small is lost. It is the catastrophe. That is what one can make ". And silence is reinstalled before our ways separate.
The scanner of Sunita will show that it can be operated.

The following day, we go in consultation with the pediatrician of Kanti Children Hôpital, hospital for children. We lead Gauri Pun Magar, 10 months, it also come from Rukum and born without anus.

The surgeon pediatrician will confirm that it can be operated, in a hospital private of Katmandou. Expensive, but less encumbered. In Kanti hospital, the operation would not take place before four months. It is thus tells us the surgeon: “The public hospitals, like Kanti, are overflowed. The population of Katmandou does not cease increasing. On the other hand, the means of the public hospitals are always also limited ".
Finished consultation, I slip by in Gangalal National Heart Centre. I must discuss the file of Pashupati Khada which suffers from serious cardiac problems. That made two weeks that we were informed of his case. The hospital requires a financial assistance to operate this patient. In the file, some documents let think that the family could have been given an aid on behalf of the Nepalese government. It is necessary to check this point and to see how much lack to cover the cost of the operation. This checking is necessary to avoid any problem of abuse. And it is essential to check even if the first feeling is to make the operations as fast as possible. In Nepal, as in other countries, one must find right measurement between the reason and the heart. And enters, it is the fate of the patients which is played sometimes.

We will spend two good hours to be discussed with the cardiac surgeon. We will agree to point out the father of Pashupati, with the bedside of his/her daughter. They are both in Katmandu since more than one month and have all leaves in their village of Khotan to try to save Pashupati.

Around 4 p.m., a young French association come to carry out a project in Nepal and visit us. When, suddenly, bellow in the court, a little animation challenges us. One distinguish, since the stage, the color of the tongs of the father of Pashupati: white tongs, not of doubt it is him which sat in bottom, even if one sees only his feet. Then, the continuation is terrible. It declares: “It is useless to go to the hospital. Yesterday evening, my daughter was with most badly. It was led to the service of the urgencies where she died there this night. I come back from Pashupatinah where I made burn his body ". Vis-a-vis the father, difficult to find the words right. I call the surgeon and announces to him the death of the patient, already dead at the time when we have spoke about it this same day. Died with the urgencies of its own hospital. He is not well-informed. It will only says: “We made our better. Would not be anxious. We will announce you other patients needy ". Deafened by the situation, I try to speak with the father and learn that it already lost a girl following an operation. In confusion, we even miss to ask him what she suffered about. In all cases Pashupati it had a really serious problem of heart.

My spirit very quickly haunts guilt feeling. “Doctor, that made two weeks that I know about the problem of this patient. But I could come to see you only today. If I had come two weeks ago, would you have to operate Pashupati at once the made payment? “.
The surgeon seized the direction of the question well. “” Says me he does not make feel guilty. “We are in rupture of cardiac valves and in the best of the cases; the patient would have been operated only one month later, as of reception of the next valves ".
The father of Pashupati leaves the center, the curved back, and the inflated eyes.

After ten years in Nepal, one believes sometimes that one acquired the control of his emotions. One could believe that our heart was immured, hardened. By the experiments, by the presence of the death which forms part, today here, of our daily routine. To standardize would be worst things. The guilt feeling mentioned above is surely there to avoid that.

In good of other fields, vis-a-vis the problems of planet the absence of guilt feeling authorizes anything to make, not to act and react. And it is the humanity which is threatened.

But not, a heart is never closed and fortunately there remains to us this feeling of humanity and culpability vis-a-vis misery of the others. It is surely that which pushes us and carries us to act, far from the quarrels and of the particular interests. The hope to save people exists. It is necessary to work with that. And to inform people that, even in Nepal, one can operate and save lives. The patients come often by far. Often too late, it is our principal enemy there.

This evening, I write this text since the buildings of Ishan Children where Gauri Pun Magar was operated. As of I crossed the door of the operational room post, the father awoke Gauri. She slept wisely in the arms of her mother. It took it by the feet and raised: “Looks at, now she has an anus” says me it, seeming so happy. The gamine is well. It will leave the evening even after we regulated some formalities.

It is a hope, a hope which should be maintained for all the patients, who, often, in countries like Nepal, are deprived of assistance and means. For all those which are some share there, between the reason and the heart. With us to act with understanding.